Picture courtesy of Ted Strutz
My first instinct was that the view out of this window reminded me of Finding Nemo. From there, this story unfolded.
Word count: 100
Reflection
Staring out the window, Emily was reminded of Finding Nemo.
It hit her again, a feeling of breathlessness from being struck hard in the gut. The hours spent on the couch, snuggled together under his blanket, watching Nemo one more time, one more time. For a month or two, it was the must-watch DVD, leaving its indelible mark on her memory.
Impossible, really. There are no rules for how to carry on when you’ve lost a piece of your heart. Four years gone, a hole left just his size, Emily traces a raindrop on its lonely path down the pane.
© Erin Leary
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This has to be the loss of a child. I have two co-workers with two year old boys (mine is 22) and we were discussing the movies they watch repeatedly.
Very sad, very touching. Hope she finds Nemo again some day.
Erin,
I like the way you took a thought about a movie and turned it into a story all your own. Nicely handled.
Marie Gail
Dear Erin,
You’ve left an ache the size of your story in my heart. No mother should outlive her child. Effective use of repetition. Powerful, poignant and well written.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Dear Erin,
It pleases me to be able to write, ‘Powerful story’. The line, ‘one more time, one more time’ is heartbreakingly good. This is a story you should mark down as one of your best and one of this week’s best. Well done.
Aloha,
Doug
Really good. I had to read it twice after I read the comments, but really, it is good.
Erin, This was lovely and heartbreaking at the same time. If that had happened to me I think I would have put away that DVD away.forever. Well written. —Susan
a hole left just his size, OUCH! Well told story in 100 words.
Not a story any mom wants to read, but one all moms have in common. hugs for sharing what’s never far from this mom’s mind…
Time doesn’t necessarily heal. Sensitively told.
Dear Erin, This is so well written! I’ve seen “Finding Nemo” many times and love the movie. Had, I ever lost a child, I don’t know what I would do – everyone would have to mourn in their own way. Erin, you have really done a fabulous job with this prompt. I’m in awe! Nan 🙂
Beautifully told – the under-blanket warmth contrasted so well with that lonely finger tracing the rain. The difference in mood between the two paragraphs emphasis the loss perfectly.
Erin, this is gorgeous. It’s amazing how you took something as playful as Finding Nemo, and take us on such a heartbreaking journey. “One more time, one more time…” What parent hasn’t heard that, a hundred times? Brilliant.