Picture courtesy of Sandra Crook
Village life in France…this photo makes me want to be there now.
This story may be the predecessor of last week’s tale of reprisal.
Word count: 98
Hay Fever
The smell of hay brought it all back. Summers spent on the farm, the warm afternoons in the hayloft, their sighs disturbing only the mice. Smiling, she shook her head at the memory; at their folly, his hay fever, the sneezing.
Stepping up the pace to reach to pharmacy, she didn’t want to keep her husband waiting. His allergies were bothering him this week. Eyes red-rimmed and weepy, he cursed the hay truck as it passed.
“Damn hay – gets me every time” he said, sneezing loudly again.
Suddenly, she knew where he’d been that afternoon. Suddenly, she knew.
© Erin Leary
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Oh snap! Hope she gets back at him! Maybe a pillow made of hay?
Great idea – but she’s feeling a little more vindictive…
I like the way you think!
Haha clever title and story 🙂
Thank you!
Seems an odd place for him to be when he knows what it does to him.
Perhaps he wasn’t thinking it through. I know guys like that… 🙂
Rumbled! Nice take on the prompt Erin, now what’s she going to do about it? I like the hay-filled pillow suggestion.
I’m thinking she’s much more sinister than that. I plan to take a note from your page and do him in.
Excellent use of title and snappy change of pace at the end. You took us from lovely memories to betrayal all in 100 words. Good job, Erin. Does that mean he baled/bailed? 🙂
janet
Thank you, Janet. No matter what Helena says about you, your comments are spot on.
I think he’s going to end up inside a bale at this rate.
I’m going to disagree with Janet and maybe see if I can draw her into an Internet Troll style fight, complete with Star Trek fight music and American Gladiator batons. I think that “A Roll In The Hay” would have been a better title, to fit a very nearly perfect story. Loved this one, Erin. But Janet’s wrong. Just WRONG. And she smells. And her opinions are dumb. Na na na na na na. (feeling immature at the moment.)
True, that title would work. I thought the double play of hay fever (ailment) and hay fever (hot in the hay) was the way to go. But I’m nothing if not flexible.
Now to sell tickets to you and Janet’s throw down – May the best woman win!
I’m laughing because if Erin wouldn’t have said anything, I wouldn’t have know I’d been so grossly insulted. I like “Hay Fever” because he obviously thought he was hot (and so did at least one other someone) and it worked in the literal sense, too. You threw down the gauntlet, Helena, but I’m laughing too hard to fight. Maybe another day.
I figured I had to fan the fire – a little late but always worth a try!
Our snow must have put it out.
http://youtu.be/AphxyjrH4SE Bring it, Janet.
I am now stepping aside to watch the show….
Maybe he was with the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz? Just trying to look on the bright side.
Oh, Perry – you know that’s just not the case. The flying monkeys are coming for him…
LOL…great come back!
Good story and words used for good effect to paint a word picture. He’s not only allergic, he’s not too bright.
Yes, exactly. Seems a little self absorbed.
Good enough for him!
Nicely told – the way the human brain joins the dots without us realising that it is happening was perfectly captured
Yes – it suddenly becomes clear and not always for the better.
Sad. Will they survive together?
I am predicting they are on their last legs….
Yikes!The fool-he should have known better-couldn’t he find a better spot at least?Well,now he is in trouble-wonder if she will bring him poison instead of anti allergic meds?A wonderful story with a fascinating end,Erin 🙂
Men sometimes don’t think it all through….
So true,lol!
I’d recommend that she switch out those allergy pills with placebos. 🙂 Nicely written, Erin. I enjoy your work.
MG
I’d recommend that she change them out for cyanide. 😉
That’s where my head went, too….
Isn’t it more fun to make him wish he were dead before you actually knock him off? 😀
Cheers!
MG
Hmmmmm. Maaaaybe.
Or maybe something more….
Dear Erin,
I love the layering and subtlety of your story. Applause!
shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you. This was one of those stories that wrote itself as I went along. I thought she was out for a pleasant stroll but turns out I was wrong.
Oh stupid husband! He’s so going to get it now. Love this take on the prompt.
If you read this week’s story along with last week’s, that may be how it ends up….
Damn, he should have kept his mouth shut if he knew what was good for him. Excellent transition from innocent memories to the revealing of a betrayal!
Betrayed by a sneeze. He will get what he deserves.
Oh-oh. I like this. Very nicely done. Love, betrayal, and the wheels of vengeance turning all in 98 little words. You go, girl!
Oh now, let’s not jump to conclusions. I’m sure he has a reasonable explanation. This is only circumstancial evidence, and pretty slim at that 🙂 Or is this the straw that broke her back?