Photo courtesy of Janet Webb
Word Count: 100
Sweet Surrender
To the untrained eye, it was a honeycomb. The chambers, used by the honey bee to store amber sweetness, were merely a poor replica, made from paper. Wasps, you see, once lived here, hatching their offspring. Abandoned now, it is a hollow cast off, waiting for the river to carry it away.
I see all this at a glance, pondering the usefulness of this knowledge now; wrestling on a precipice of my own making. One foot in the river, I let go, drawn into the channel like the paper wasp’s nest. Empty, alone, caving in on myself, spinning slowly downstream.
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© Erin Leary
The narrator sounds to have reached a crisis in his or her life. Nicely done.
Dear Erin,
A haunting analogy between the narrator’s life and the empty wasp nest. Nicely done.
shalom,
Rochelle
I think we’ve all felt that empty, hollow feeling from time to time. You captured it well.
You captured her feeling of hopelessness and hollowness very well, Erin.
janet
I know I’m pinching from Rochelle here, but ‘haunting’ describes your piece so well for me, Erin. Very touching, and sad, and beautifully written.
I enjoyed this. The hollow cast off wasps’ nest mirroring the feelings of the narrator. Nice 🙂
A moment of clarity swallowed up in (what sounds like) depression… well written.
enjoyed the symbolism 🙂
How sad to be in that final, “empty nest” suicidal state. Well done.
I enjoyed reading this. Nicely written though very sad. Well done
Dee
Helplessness is paralyzing when there seems no way out. Well done Erin!
Nice look at a moment of clarity right before the point of no return.